


8. Those Pesky Kids - The Finale!

by thealphagate_archivist



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Friendship, Holiday, Humor, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-12-15
Updated: 2008-12-15
Packaged: 2019-02-02 08:37:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12723246
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thealphagate_archivist/pseuds/thealphagate_archivist
Summary: Jack POV/Humour.  They’re home and they’re together – time for friendship and celebrations… with a few surprises thrown in!





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> Note from the archivists: this story was originally archived at [The Alpha Gate](https://fanlore.org/wiki/The_Alpha_Gate), a Stargate SG-1 archive, which began migration to the AO3 in 2017 when its hosting software, eFiction, was no longer receiving support. To preserve the archive, we began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in November 2017. We e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are this creator and it hasn't transferred to your AO3 account, please contact us using the e-mail address on [The Alpha Gate collection profile](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/thealphagate).
> 
>  **Author's notes:** Alas, this is the last story in my little Pesky Kids series, and I want to take this opportunity to thank everyone who has been so amazingly supportive during the past year. Also, thank you for all the wonderful reviews! Wow! I am deeply honoured to have received so many positive comments and I absolutely love to hear how much you have all enjoyed my little pesky journey.
> 
> Many thanks to Michelle and Alphagate for the chance to publish my story online. This is the best fan fiction site I have come across and it has allowed me to share my story with so many people.
> 
> Special thanks go to the Pesky Kids’ biggest fans who have offered such amazing support and even started the Pesky Kids fan club! You are bright, shining stars!
> 
> Extra, extra special thanks, and hugs, go to ‘Mom’ who has been with me every step of the way. She has been my editor, American/British language coach, and grammar guru! She has been there to guide me, encourage me, lift me up on a pedestal, and pick me up off the floor! We’ve laughed and cried during the writing of this series, and I am deeply proud of the accomplishment. Thank you so much for everything, ‘Mom’! What a ride, huh?! ^_^
> 
> I hope you all enjoy the final story, and perhaps someday we can enjoy more pesky adventures together!
> 
> So, here we go! Here is part 1 of 3. If you haven't already, you might want to read 'Those Pesky Kids!', 'Those Pesky Kids Again!', 'Those Pesky Kids Give Me No Respect!', 'Those Pesky Kids Can Go Fish!', ‘Those Pesky Kids Are Getting Cheeky!’, ‘Those Pesky Kids… Why Me?’, and ‘Those Pesky Kids Are Heading Home’, first (phew!). This story will make far more sense if you do! ;-)
> 
> Sara x

****

“Show me the way to go home.”

“Jack, please stop singing.”

“I’m hungry and I wanna take a pee.”

“Jaaack!”

“I had a long-haul flight about an hour ago.”

“Oh, for heaven’s sake.”

“Where the hell is my front door key?!”

“What?”

“I can’t find my damn key, Daniel.”

I wasn’t kidding either; I really do need to pee! Why is it that when you’re so desperate for the can that you’re in danger of wetting yourself, simple tasks, like unlocking your front door, become as difficult as a damn lunar landing?

“I could have sworn it was in this bag.”

For God’s sake, hold it in! I’m a forty *cough* year old man and I haven’t messed my pants since I was three. There is no way in hell I am peeing myself on my own front doorstep!

“Oh, for crying out loud!”

Work those muscles, Jack! 

“That’s it! I’m breaking down the door, Daniel.”

Think dry thoughts, O’Neill. Crackers, sawdust, deserts, talcum powder, my sex life!

“Here, move out of the way, Jack. I think I have my key.” 

Oh, thank God!

“If you make it in time for me not to disgrace myself in front of the neighbours, I promise I won’t poke fun at your phallic shaped rocks, I won’t make hand puppets out of your underwear in the locker room, and I’ll stop sewing your socks together.”

“Yeah, right, Jack.”

I’m well and truly humiliating myself now. In my desperation, I’ve had to resort to the classic ‘really gotta pee’ dance. Everyone on the face of the planet knows these frantic gesticulations and instantly recognises the terrible affliction in others. I look like Michael friggin’ Flatley!

“Hurry, Daniel, or I won’t need to go anymore!”

“There, got it!”

I assume he heard my heartfelt ‘thank you’ as I disappear down the hall while trying to undo my pants at the same time. You can make it, Jack!

You know, I could have sworn I didn’t have these problems when I was younger.

 

On to part 2…


	2. Part 2

  
Author's notes: Here's part 2 of 3!  


* * *

****

“Daniel?”

Where’s he gone?

“Daaaniel?” 

We left the airport just as soon as we landed. On the way home we decided to have a little celebration this evening to mark the end of our vacation. 

Teal’c wanted to go Jell-O wrestling, which was vehemently rejected by the science twins because the offending establishment refuses to use blue Jell-O apparently. Sacrilege!

I wanted to go to the karaoke night at O’Malley’s just for the sheer amusement value. Teal’c insisted on introducing us all to the apparent joys of amateur singing last Christmas. Needless to say, the night was pretty unforgettable. Teal’c didn’t need much encouragement, and he and Carter sang their own rendition of ‘I Got You Babe’. What with it being Christmas, I let Daniel have more than his usual one beer allowance, and as his many inhibitions swiftly made a run for it, he soon joined in the party atmosphere. Actually, he started off singing some Italian song and sounded surprisingly like that Josh Growbag kid, but as the evening rolled by, he slowly degenerated into sounding, and looking, more like an irked camel.

However, for tonight, karaoke was instantly struck off the list of possible evening activities, and after a whispered conversation among themselves, the geek squad requested a quiet team BBQ at my place.

You can guess what happened next though! Carter conveniently insisted that she needed to go home first and check on her house, and Teal’c was adamant that she required assistance. Terrible liars, both of them. They just wanted to get out of helping me. Daniel was the only one who agreed to come back to casa O’Neill and lend a hand with the preparations.

However, now that my bladder is no longer the size of a basketball, Daniel is nowhere to be found.

“Daniel?” 

Ah, what’s this on the fridge?

_Jack,_  
I really need to go home and make sure my apartment is okay, and check on my fish. I’ll only be a couple of hours, I promise. Sam and Teal’c will be over at about 6pm. Sorry, 18:00 hours. ;-)   
See you later, alligator!  
Daniel. 

I see. Well, that’s not so bad. He should still be back in plenty of time to help me.

Okay, first job on the agenda is to have a beer!

And then…. oh yeah, I need ingredients.

“Show me the way to the store - my BBQ’s in need of giant steaks…”

****

It’s 15:00 hours and my mission to the supermarket was a success. The house is dusted and vacuumed, the BBQ’s ready to be lit, the meat is marinating, the salad is prepared, and the baked potatoes are all scrubbed and ready to go in the oven. 

Dr ‘I promise I’ll be back in two hours’ Jackson is late already, and I’ve had to do everything all on my own. So, for the next two hours, I have an appointment with my bathtub. I know I should probably hang up my clothes too rather than leave them strewn across the floor, but screw it! And in payment for being abandoned by my own team, I’m stealing shameful amounts of Carter’s expensive bubble bath. I know, I’m mean, but…

What the…?! 

Oh, no, no, no, no, no!

This can’t be right! 

I know it’s never good when you come home from vacation and catch your naked little self in the mirror for the first time, but for heaven’s sake! What the hell happened to me? I look like my Dad, for crying out loud!

I have deep elastic marks where my boxers and socks have been, and my stomach is losing its battle to remain flat. Not to mention that I’m in serious danger of needing my own brassiere! What’s with all the extra padding? Oh, God, dare I turn around? Maybe if I squint. Oh, come on!! Shocking tan lines and a huge pearly white ass are too much! Not fair! 

And what is up with my hair? I look like I’ve been molested by a family of apes!

This is not good. How can I impress all the ladies looking like this?

Oh no! That means I’m going to have to go on a diet, which means no beer, no cookies, no chips and dip, no BBQs! It also means Ferretti will poke fun at me, Teal’c will insist I spend more time in the gym, and Daniel will become overly enthusiastic and sickeningly supportive. Oh God, I can see him pinning a weight loss chart to my fridge, and he’ll be calculating calories and studying all the labels. 

Kill me now!

****

Ah, nothing beats a deep, hot bath, with bubbles right up to the ceiling. I’ve been looking forward to this all day and if anyone deserves it, I do!

“Jack?”

Oh, you have to be kidding me! _Now_ he decides to turn up?

“Jack?”

“I’m in the bath, Daniel!”

“Oh, okay.”

I am not cutting short my bath just because Daniel’s finally decided to arrive. No sir. No way. He’ll just have to wait.

“Jack?”

“For crying out loud, Daniel. You can’t just walk in on someone in the bath! Have you heard of privacy?”

“Sorry.”

He’s evidently not sorry because he’s simply perched himself on the closed toilet seat! Thankfully, my modesties are buried under three feet of bubbles, but that’s not the point.

“Did you need something, Daniel?”

“Uh… well… no, I guess not.”

That’s Daniel code for ‘yes, and I really need to talk about it’. Actually, he looks pretty miserable. He’s only been out of my sight for three hours; what could possibly have happened in that time?

“What is it, Daniel?”

“Huh?”

“What’s wrong?”

“Oh… um… well, I got home, and… uh…”

Oh, God, his face is screwing up. He’s actually gonna cry. I’m naked, soaking wet in a blissful bath full of giant bubbles, and my best friend is crying on my toilet!

“Daniel, what happened?”

“He… he’s dead, Jack.”

“Holy shit! Who’s dead? Wait a second, I’m getting out.”

Please, don’t tell me it’s another long lost professor, with more vindictive friends and crazy ex-girlfriends not far behind.

Okay, I’m out. Unfortunately, my bath towel is still in the dryer, so I’ve had to make do with a hand towel, which as you can imagine, doesn’t really ‘make do’ at all!

“Come on, Daniel. Let’s go and sit on the bed.”

“’Kay.”

“Now, who’s dead, Buddy?”

“Ramses.”

Ramses? Oh, heck, I’ve heard Daniel mention the name before, and I’m pretty sure I’m supposed to know who he is. 

“I’m so sorry, Danny.”

“Yeah.” 

Damn it, why don’t I ever listen?! Although, who the hell calls their kid Ramses anyway? It’s a ridiculous name.

Uh oh, tissue alert! He’s about to wipe his snot and tear covered hands on my comforter!

“Here, use a tissue, Daniel. I’d rather not be combing your body fluids out of my hair tonight.”

“That’s gross, Jack.”

“So is wiping your snotty hands on my pillow.”

“Sorry.”

Oh, crap, the tears are falling again. 

“Come ‘ere, Buddy.”

I really hate stuff like this. And who the hell is this Ramses person? Think, Jack, think! 

“God, this is ridiculous!” 

“What is, Daniel?”

“Crying.” 

“Hey, there is nothing wrong with crying. Especially if someone close to you has just died.”

“Some _one_? What are talking about, Jack?”

“Ramses.”

“Ramses was my angel fish, Jack.” 

“What?!”

His God damn fish?! 

“You knew that.”

“A _fish_?!” 

Oh, my glorious bubbles are going to waste!

“I bought him just after Sha’re died. You came with me when I got him, remember?”

“Oh… yeah.”

I remember now. As you would expect, Daniel was not doing so well back then. He stayed at my place for a while after Sha’re’s death and although he did great at hiding his feelings at work, he finally let the façade slide at home. I’ve learned that Daniel always seems to need something or someone with which to nourish his nurturing energies. It stabilises him, you know? Looking after himself doesn’t count, but having someone or something else to look after gives Daniel purpose. A fish was about the only thing he could buy back then seeing as we still never knew how often we’d be earth side. Plus, he wasn’t allowed any other pets at his apartment. 

“Memory like Swiss cheese here, sorry, Buddy.”

“That’s okay. He was only a fish, I guess.”

“No, Daniel. He wasn’t only a fish. He was _your_ fish.”

“I know, but…”

“No buts, Danny Boy. I don’t care if it’s a dog, a person, a moose, or a lizard. If they meant something to you, and you cared for them, then it’s not okay.”

“I guess.”

“Listen, my friend Patricia rescues rabbits, did you know that?”

“No.”

“Well, she does. She has loads of them now. Even called one of them ‘Danny’.”

“Really?”

“Yep! Cute little thing too. Although the last time I visited he peed on my pants.”

“Oh, well, go Danny!”

“Ha ha, very funny! Anyway, you’ve heard me mention my cousin James before, haven’t you?”

“The one that lives in Northern Ireland?”

“Yep, that one. Well, he works on a farm, and he hates spraying the fields with insecticide. He doesn’t even like to see the insects suffer.”

“Well, that’s understandable.”

“They’re insects, Daniel! Anyway, the point is, no matter how hard they try, people will always get attached to little critters. Hell, when my neighbour’s dog went missing, she was inconsolable. Poor woman didn’t know what to do with herself.”

“That was Patti, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah.”

“But… you slept with her, didn’t you?”

“Uh... well… yeah, but… I was trying to console her.”

“By giving her something to do with herself?”

Cheeky little ass!

“Anyway! What I’m trying to say is that didn’t Ramses get sick last year? His fins went all funny didn’t they?”

“Yeah.”

“And didn’t you research what was wrong and get the right stuff to make him better?”

“Well, yes, of course, but…”

“Then he was _your_ fish, Daniel. He was a living creature, your pet, and you were responsible for him. He meant something to you, and regardless of what anyone else says, you have a right to be upset, okay?”

“Oh... thanks, Jack.”

Oh, crap, I didn’t mean to make him cry again. I really hate stuff like this. I mentioned that already, didn’t I?

“So, uh… did you flush Ramses, Danny?”

“No, I couldn’t flush him down my toilet, Jack.”

“Oh, right, of course. You wanna flush him down mine?”

“No!”

“Yeah, on second thoughts, you’re probably right. No fish should be put through that. Dead or not.”

“I did bring him with me.”

“You did? Well, how about we put him out for the neighbour’s cat?”

“Jack!”

“Okay, okay. Why don’t we bury him in the yard? We could have a little funeral and everything.”

“Yeah, that’d be good. I feel ridiculous, but that would be nice.”

“Good. Let’s do it!”

“Just you and me though, yeah? I don’t want anyone else to know about this, Jack.”

“Yeahsureyabetcha, Danny Boy; just you and me. Now scoot, so I can get dressed will ya? I’m cold, I’m wet, and important parts of my anatomy have gone into hiding.”

“Okay. I’ll go and put on some extra strong coffee.”

“You do that, Buddy.

****

“We are gathered here today…” 

“Jaaack.” 

The kid is giggling. That’s a good sign. 

“…to celebrate the life of Ramses; beloved finned friend of Daniel Jackson’s.”

“Jack, really, it’s fine.”

“No, wait, I have more. Ramses was a fetching fish and a credit to his species.”

“You’re such an ass.”

“He will be greatly missed by all who watched him swim.”

“Bye, Ramses.”

“Scales to scales…”

Oh, he’s laughing now.

“Fins to fins, and all that stuff. Rest in peace, fishy.”

We’ll just put some earth on top and a little rock, and then we’re done.

“You okay, Daniel?”

“Yeah. Thanks for everything, Jack, and for making me not feel like a complete idiot.”

“That’s why I’m here, Danny Boy. That’s why I’m here.” 

 

On to part 3…


	3. Part 3

****

Now that the fishy is no more, I have a brief window of time to email my sister. She wanted to know all about the vacation and she threatened to, and I quote, pickle my manhood in vinegar, if I didn’t email her as soon as we stepped through the door. Lovely, kind-hearted woman. She’s never met Carter and T, although she’s heard all about them, but she did meet Daniel when he was staying with me, right after coming home from Abydos. I tell ya, it was love at first sight, and she’s wanted regular Daniel updates ever since. In fact, if the little shit had been any younger, I think she’d have requested adoption papers.

Speaking of the little shit; I hear footsteps.

“Daniel, quit peaking over my shoulder.” 

“Sorry.”

Oh, dear. He’s standing there, hands in pockets, staring at his feet, and bobbing up and down on his toes. This means one of two things. Either he’s done something he shouldn’t have done and is trying to ‘fess up, or he wants to ask me something and he’s embarrassed.

“What have you broken, Daniel?”

“Broken? I haven’t broken anything!”

Okay, that seemed genuine. In that case…

“What is it you want then?”

“How did you know…?”

“Ah, my Daniel spidy-sense was tingling. Spill.” 

“Uh, well, I was wondering if you would come with me to… uh… get another fish?”

“Now?”

“Well, yes.”

“Right now?”

“Yeah, we have time before Sam and Teal’c get here, don’t we? And there’s nothing else to prepare, is there? 

“Well, no, but…”

“So, we can go, right?”

“No! We flew in from London this morning, Daniel, and frankly, I’d kinda like to just relax.”

Oh, geez, there go the eyes. I’m not looking!

I gave up my coveted bubble bath for this kid; the watery eyes are _not_ going to work!

“It’s… uh… it’s okay, Jack. We don’t have to… if you don’t want.”

Oh, no! I looked up! You know better than to sneak a peak, O’Neill! The patented Daniel pout is mortally dreaded by all SGC team leaders, colleagues, protective Jaffa, fellow geeks, fatherly generals, visiting Pentagon majors, unsuspecting political assholes, and all bad guys galaxy wide! It just comes out of nowhere, latches onto your safely protected and highly trained balls of steel and proceeds to surreptitiously turn them into marshmallows!

“That was a big sigh, Jack.”

“Yeah, I was just wondering whether to toast my marshmallows tonight.”

“Huh?”

“Nothing. All right, Daniel, we’ll go now. Just let me finish this email, okay?”

“Thanks, Jack!”

Yeah, yeah, whatever.

“Uh, Daniel, what are you doing?”

“Oh, it’s for Eve. Say ‘hi’ from me.” 

“This is a private email, Daniel.”

“I can’t help it, you know.”

“What? Snooping?”

“Yeah. I’m an archaeologist, and am therefore inquisitive by nature.”

“You’re downright nosey, that’s what you are. What is it with you and wanting to know absolutely everything there is to know?”

“Well…”

He’s still reading my email.

“I can’t help but feel that the more I see and learn now…”

Now he’s peeking through the papers I have on my desk.

“…the less I need to dig up in the future.”

“Out, Snoopy! The last thing I need is to be excavated. Christ only knows what you’d find! Let’s just go and get this damn fish.”

****

That was a nightmare! Fifty breeds of fish and three aquarium stores later, and we finally found the perfect Angel Fish for Dr ‘I don’t like the look of that one’ Jackson. He came very close on at least two occasions to having a guppy shoved where the sun doesn’t shine!

Anyway, after threatening to put the damn thing on the BBQ, Ramses II - come on, this is Daniel we’re talking about - is happily swimming in his new tank.

As I pull into my driveway, already late for our BBQ, Daniel is so psyched about something that he’s practically purring, and I’m so hungry I could eat my own marshmallows.

“Come on, Jack. Let’s go round the back.”

“Why? I have a perfectly good front door.”

“I know, but I want to go round the back.”

Okay, something’s squirrelly here. The last time I saw Daniel this bouncy was over the spotted dick incident when he fell off his chair.

Before I even have a chance to answer, he’s disappeared round the side of my house. If I didn’t know better, I’d swear that boy had a built-in hyper drive.

“It’s all right, Daniel. I’ll carry everything!”

Little ingrate! We stopped on the way home to pick up some more beer and I let Daniel have one while I was driving. Judging by the fact that his current behaviour is reminiscent of when Janet has him hooked up to a morphine drip, perhaps that was a mistake. 

Oooh, hang on just a minute; I can smell steaks. Follow that glorious aroma, Jack. Beautiful, gorgeous, get in my belly right now, steaks! I can taste them already. Succulent, perfectly seasoned…

“SURPRISE!!”

Holy mother of God!! 

I think I just soiled myself!

“What the hell is going on here?!”

“Surprise, Jack!”

Crap! Give me a minute. I need to stop my heart from trying to break through my rib cage!

Evidently, Carter and Teal’c got here early, and now that I can safely confirm that my underpants have no uninvited deposits, I can see that they are standing in front of what looks like a pile of rocks in my backyard. Daniel is obviously in on this latest pesky project because he’s positively shaking. 

“We wanted to get you something special, Sir!”

“Something special?”

“Indeed. We wished to create a physical depiction of our holiday destination to properly commemorate our vacation, O’Neill.”

“And scaring the crap out of me was part of the plan?”

“Yes, Sir!”

“Indeed.”

“Ta dah!!” Daniel enthusiastically contributes while waving his arms in the air. I’m tellin’ ya; that beer was a mistake.

As they all theatrically step aside, I can see that my ‘something special’ is, in fact, just a pile of rocks. How can that be branded as ‘special’? Unless you’re Daniel ‘rock lover’ Jackson, of course. 

“Isn’t it great, Jack?”

“Honestly? I’m not really sure. They’re rocks. But, actually, uh, I guess it does look kinda familiar.” 

“We’ve called it ‘Jackhenge’!”

“Jackhenge?”

“Yeah! It’s a miniature version of Stonehenge! Amazing, huh?”

Jackhenge. Ha! That’s actually pretty cool. Now that I can see it from all angles, it looks just like the real deal. And I should know; I spent five hours staring at the damn thing.

Daniel is standing next to me and I can feel him vibrating with pent up excitement. Honestly, he needs to just do a few laps round the house to get it out of his system. 

“You okay, Daniel? I’ve never seen you get this excited over a successful erection in my back yard.”

Oops! Carter just spit out her coffee!

“Sorry Major.”

“Ha ha, very funny, Jack.”

“Yes, I thought so.”

“You’re such an ass. I’m going to get another beer.”

Yeah, like _that’s_ a good idea!

Hey! Hang on a fish-loving minute! All the pieces of this little puzzle are finally falling into place, and I think the proverbial light bulb above my head has just gone ‘ding’!

“Whoa there just a minute, Danny Boy!”

“Yes.”

“I’m guessing that your sudden insistence this afternoon that we go and get you a new fish right away was really a ploy to get me out of the house so this could be set up.” 

“Well, yeah. I did want a new fish, but I guess I didn’t _have_ to get one today. It just seemed like the ideal way to get rid of you for a bit. Do you want a beer, Jack?”

Sneaky little brats!

“Yeah, that’d be good. I think I need one.”

“Do you like it, Sir?”

“Are you kidding, Carter? I think it’s great. You guys actually made this?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“For me?”

“Yep!”

“This afternoon?”

“Yuh huh!”

You know, that’s… uh… kinda sweet. 

“May I ask why?”

“Jack.”

Uh oh, Daniel suddenly has that look on his face. The soft, yet serious, slightly frowny look. I get the feeling I may not want to hear this.

“I don’t think you realise quite what this vacation meant to us.”

“Nah, it was nothing.”

“Jack, please. We want to say this. We made Jackhenge because we wanted you to remember this vacation as much as we will. Teal’c has barely been outside the mountain in the past four years, let alone been permitted to actually leave the country. Do you remember when he first came here and he asked you to show him our world?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, he really meant it, Jack. Teal’c gave up everything to join us, and although he fights for the freedom of the Jaffa, he also fights for the people of _this_ planet. It means a lot to him to see more of the world he risks his life everyday to save.”

Oh. 

I think I need to sit down.

“Despite the obvious need for a break, and the inherent inability to stop working, and yes, before you say anything, I know I come under that category too…”

“Yep.”

“Sam had never been to England before, Jack.”

“But my Grandmother came from there, Sir.”

“I… uh… I didn’t know that.”

“Sam was really close to her Grandma, Jack, but she never saw her again after her Mom died. She came from Wells, not far from Stonehenge, and I don’t think Sam can fully express just how important it was for her to see where her Grandmother lived, and also where her Mom was born and grew up.”

I can see Carter brushing away a few tears, and I gotta tell ya, my eyes are feeling suspiciously scratchy.

“As for me, Jack, my foster parents were nice people, but I never felt like I was a real part of their family. You know me, I’ve never been one for self-pity, but after my parents died, I had to look out for myself. I’d never been on a real family holiday like this. I missed out on that, and I don’t think you realise what it meant to me to know that I could just be myself, relax and have fun, and know that whatever happened, you’d take care of it.”

I’m fine. Really. Honestly, I’m fine. I just don’t think I can speak right now.

“So, thanks for the vacation, Jack, and we hope you like Jackhenge.”

“Thanks for everything, Sir.”

“Indeed.”

Don’t choke, O’Neill.

“You want another beer, Jack?”

“Uh… _ahem_ … yeah. Tha… that’d be good, thanks.”

“I’ll get it, Daniel. I need to check the oven, anyway.”

“Okay, Sam. You all right, Jack?”

“Yeah, fine. I’m fine.”

“You’re not crying, are you?”

“Of course not, Daniel, I’m fine. Anyway, I don’t cry.”

“Yeah, riiight!”

“I don’t.”

“You do.”

“Don’t!” 

“Do!”

“I don’t, Daniel!”

“You cried when we watched Ice Age and it looked like the sabre-toothed tiger had died.”

“His name was Diego, and I had something in my eye!”

“What, both of them?”

“Yes!”

“The baked potatoes are ready, guys!”

Saved by the major!

“Excellent! Feed me, Seymour!”

“Oooh, I know what that means now!”

Only Daniel, after having just one beer, could get that excited over that fact.

“Yep, that you do, Danny Boy. Okay, guys, let’s eat!”

****

“You wanted to see me, General?”

Well, the vacation is finally over. After dragging our sorry jet lagged asses out of bed at 0500 this morning, Carter is already working on a new naquada project, Teal’c is busy training some marines in hand-to-hand combat, and Daniel is lost in some urgent translation that only he can decipher. We have a mission briefing scheduled for 0800 tomorrow and I’ve been summoned to the general’s office.

“Take a seat, Jack.”

“Thank you, Sir.”

“How was the vacation, son?”

“Oh, you know how it goes, Sir.”

“Yes, Jack, I think I do. If I were to guess, I’d say that Teal’c gave you very few problems other than the occasional raised eyebrow and perhaps the odd chastisement for any inevitable juvenile behaviour on your part. I suspect Major Carter teamed up with her pseudo sibling, fuelled up his rarely seen mischievous side, and enjoyed herself watching you suffer the consequences. Ultimately, I expect the entire vacation was spent doing whatever Dr Jackson wanted because he unknowingly has you all wrapped around his little finger.”

Wow, he’s good!

“I take it SG-1 had fun, Colonel?”

The old reprobate is grinning from ear to ear!

“Yes, Sir, we had fun. Actually, I’m thinking about where to take them next.”

“Sounds like a good plan, Colonel. However, I do need you all back at work for the time being, starting with our briefing at 0800.”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Dismissed, Colonel.”

I salute the General with every ounce of respect I can muster. The man deserves it. He signed off on a whole two week vacation for SG-1, and what a vacation!

As I close the door, I swear I hear ol’ George chuckle, “Pesky kids!”

 

The End.

^_^


End file.
